*a 3 minute read*
People love to take the piss (figuratively and literally). For generations and centuries, if people have the opportunity to finesse you and make their life a little easier by inconveniencing yours, they will – without any hesitation.
It’s a simple cause, quite frankly, and you have to look at it in the way society was established. Society has been constructed around and reinforcing the mindset of “life isn’t fair” for years. To play this game of life, you either create your own rules to navigate your daily antics or you fall in line and follow others, mindlessly letting people make decisions for you.
It’s why structure in your life is essential, because without it, there’s chaos. It’s why your mindset about how you approach situations is important, because without it, you’re walking around like a headless chicken. And it’s why if you always let people take advantage of you, you’ll live a life of being a pushover without any real purpose.
In today’s world, people will want to squeeze everything out of you to make their life just a little bit better. Strictly think about the way people behave and talk to you and some examples may start to form in your mind.
As my fellow brethren would say, you have to be able to spot the finesse tactics from early and eliminate the possibility of any “snake” behaviour reoccurring (snake behaviour – standard abbreviation for a backstabber or two-faced person). The snakes hide in plain sight — you can usually tell how people really feel by their habitual actions.
Quote(s) of the Day
Quotes are important for many reasons but one includes how we interpret and apply them to our lives. For reference purposes, I’ll quote a recent Kendrick Lamar song, which starts to make sense the more you say it along with the interpretation I’ll provide below. (Kendrick is one of the top 5 greatest rappers of all time btw, don’t @ me thanks).
The quote lyric is from the song titled “Savior” and it’s as simple as this: “Are you happy for me? Really, are you happy for me?“
The emphasis on being happy for someone is where we’ll take this a step further. You’ll be seen doing well, creating a path for yourself trying to succeed and you’ll have people reach out to you. On the surface level they seem happy for you, offering praises and big ups from time to time, but in reality, they are waiting on an opportunity to hit you with a maneuver so sweet you’re left wondering, “how did I let this happen?”.
Some will say they want the best for you but hide their true intentions behind a simple smile. Ironically, the next line in the same Kendrick song states, “Smile in my face, but are you happy for me?”
Even within that smile, something seen as pure and easy to put on, may be a delusion. Multiplied, these delusions cause further illusion, until you’re accustomed to a reality of being surrounded by fake love.
Don’t Get Caught Lacking
Now, I’m not saying to question every single person who smiles at you because believe me, you will go insane and Timeless Thoughts will not be liable for this behaviour (I can’t be hit with that type of lawsuit, the finances aren’t looking too healthy). There’s just a level of healthy suspicion you have to have for people in your life, and for some of them, the smile is their greatest weapon.
You can be exploited for your time, money, talent, mentality, body, the list goes on and on. This initial smile, along with some slick wordplay, can be the first step of a long term scheme. In a world where providing value to someone goes a long way, there’s a justified level of concern about being manipulated and taken for a fool, and we don’t like looking foolish on this side of town (Rexdale, stand up).
I could sit here and give you the scientific reasons someone might show they’re happy for you; while there is validity to the science, I’d rather explain it my way. There are actions and follow up actions that allow you to see and feel people genuinely wanting you to succeed. Examples include constant motivation and reassurance, positive responses, resharing your work and giving constructive criticism to improve on what you are doing. I also have to point out people showing up to your events and engaging with the activities. This is what you need to look for.
Some will comment on your posts and show up to events to “save face” and make an appearance. Call it keeping short and simple. There is a time and place for that. But if you are not actively engaging and showing some type of effort, you don’t want to see me win. You don’t want me to reach the best version of myself. And while everyone needs to believe in themselves first, it’s almost impossible to get anywhere without the right supporting cast around you. So I ask you all to think carefully and ask honestly of the people around you, “Are you happy for me? Really, are you happy for me?”.
Thank you for reading, let me know what you think of the article in the comments below. Feel free to share with a friend and answer the question below. I’ll be back soon. Drink oat milk tonight and don’t say I never put you on. Bless up.
Timeless Thoughts 